Rhubarb and Custard Tart

Weekend baking to brighten up grey days and a blessing for all of us who feel exhausted.

‘Tis the season of forced rhubarb

A quick visit to your local farm shop (or supermarket if you’re lucky) at this time of year there’s every likelihood you’ll find your eye caught by enticingly long lengths of beautiful bright pink rhubarb.

On my kitchen shelf lives a dog eared recipe notebook half unravelling from it’s binding. It’s one I started just over fourteen years ago - the rule is that every time I try a recipe which is deemed delicious enough to be repeated, it goes in the book. It was inspired by one which lives in my mother’s kitchen, although that book is far older and wiser than my own.

The part I enjoy about the notebook the most is that next to each recipe I write the date I first make the item alongside who’s mouth it was destined for.

The particular recipe I’m sharing with you was was first baked in 2013 for a wonderful woman whose children I used to babysit, and whose scruff-ball of a dog I would care for when they were away. It was always a popular menu addition to my lockdown ‘Barn Bakery’ project - just before the times of Wildling Studio.

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It’s all in the noticing…

This week I have been busy preparing for a new offering which starts tomorrow evening - ‘The Sunday Unwinding Club’. It’s not too late to join and you can find out more about it here.

It’s a chance to join me over Zoom for a four weeks of gentle yoga, self inquiry and journalling - £25 (includes all fours sessions).

Our first topic is ‘awareness’. Awareness, at times, feels like a bit of an enigma, an intangible thing I can’t quite put my finger on. But perhaps, that’s just it - awareness is the space between things. Space in which we can rest and begin to see ourselves more clearly, a space which invites gentle change.

With more awareness we can begin to notice our habits and patterning, to watch as an emotion washes through us instead of simply reacting to it. Awareness acts as a neutral home from which we can engage in life whilst comfortably residing within ourselves, instead of constantly being entangled in our emotions and pulled one way or another by our reactions. It’s something that is wide open, always peaceful, always neutral and always there for us to come home to.

This is not to say that we should try to erase the rainbow spectrum of emotions we experience as part of begin human. Emotions add a moving and enriching soundtrack to our lives. Instead it’s that we don’t always need to act on them, simply notice as they pass over us like clouds.

Tomorrow we’ll be adventuring through the heartlands of our inner landscape cultivating awareness in our bodies, thought patterns and habits.

“There is a resting place, a starting place that you can always return to. You can always bring your mind back home and rest right here, right now, in present, unbiased awareness.” - Pema Chödrön

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Edge Walking

I love when you feel inspired to reply these newsletters. In response to last week’s post on Wild Edges, Paula shared a though provoking article which she’s given permission for me to pass onto you all.

“There have always been edge walkers: those who didn’t follow along with the status quo, who didn’t swallow the version of religion offered by those on top of the hierarchy as The Only Way. And at that edge, spirituality and nature are in unbroken relationship.”

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A Blessing For One Who is Exhausted

When the rhythm of the heart becomes hectic,
Time takes on the strain until it breaks;
Then all the unattended stress falls in
On the soul like an endless, increasing weight.

The light in the mind becomes dim.
Things you could take in your stride before
Now become laboursome events of will. 

Weariness invades your spirit. 
Gravity begins falling inside you, 
Dragging down every bone. 

The tide you never valued has gone out. 
And you are marooned on unsure ground. 
Something within you has close down;
And you cannot push yourself back to life. 

You have been forced to enter empty time. 
The desire that drove you has relinquished.
There is nothing else to do now but rest
And patiently learn to receive the self
You have forsaken in the race of days. 

At first your thinking will darken
And sadness takes over like listless weather. 
The flow of unwept tears will frighten you.
You have travelled too fast over false ground;
Now your soul has come to take you back. 

Take refuge in your senses, open up
To all the small miracles you rushed through. 

Become inclined to watch the way of rain 
When it falls slow and free. 

Imitate the habit of twilight,
Taking time to open the well of colour
That fostered the brightness of day. 

Draw alongside the silence of stone
Until it's calmness can claim you.

Be excessively gentle with yourself.

Stay clear of those vexed in spirit. 
Learn to linger around someone of ease
Who feels they have all the time in the world. 

Gradually, you will return to yourself,
Having learned a new respect for your heart
And the joy that dwells deep within slow time. 

- John O'Donohue , Benedictus - A Book Of Blessings

Wishing you much love and rest on this rainy February weekend,

Camille